Calvin and Hobbes

Just felt like reading through a few Calvin and Hobbes quotes today and they were too fun not to pass on. Hope you enjoy.

"Why isn't my life like a situation comedy? Why don't I have a bunch of friends with nothing better to do but drop by and instigate wacky adventures? Why aren't my conversations peppered with spontaneous witticisms? Why don't my friends demonstrate heartfelt concern for my well being when I have problems? ...I gotta get my life some writers."

It's hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.

"I've been visualizing the conceptualization process. That's the hard part."

"Are you crazy? This is a stupid, boring, time-wasting forced assignment! This isn't fun!"

"Are you suggesting that this appliance didn't aggravate me with malice aforethought?"

"Well, it just seemed wrong to cheat on an ethics test."

"When you get something, it's new and exciting. When you have something, you take it for granted and it's boring."

"Do the words 'complete pandemonium' strike terror in your heart?"

"If warped values are the price of a vicarious thrill, so be it!"

"I'm yet another resource-consuming kid in and overpopulated planet, raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you're old and weak."

"I try to make everyone's day a little more surreal."

"I used to make original snowmen, but it was time consuming, hard work. So I said, heck, this is crazy! Now I crank out crude imitations of what's already popular! It takes no time or thought, and most people don't care about the difference, anyway! And what good is originality if you can't crank it out?"

"Now, a lifetime of experience has left me bitter and cynical."

"People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world."

"Did you know that's one of the ten warning signs of hopeless dweebism?"

"Nobody asks me how things oughta be! I've got tons of ideas!"

"I say, when life gives you a lemon, wing it right back and add some lemons of your own!"

"These are interesting times. We don't trust the government, we don't trust the legal system, we don't trust the media, and we don't trust each other! We've undermined all authority, and with it, the basis for replacing it! It's like a six-year-old's dream come true!"

"If it was completely different, school would be great."

"My time is valuable. I can't go on thinking about one subject for minutes on end. I'm a busy man."

"Why should I have to WORK for everything?! It's like saying I don't deserve it!"

"If you do the job badly enough, sometimes you don't get asked to do it again."

"Childhood is short, maturity is forever."

"Why waste time learning, when ignorance is instantaneous?"

"You know how people are. They only recognize greatness when some authority confirms it."

"As far as I'm concerned, if something is so complicated that you can't explain it in 10 seconds, then it's probably not worth knowing anyway."

"True friends are hard to come by ... I need more money."

"There's an inverse relationship between how good something is for you, and how much fun it is."

"(During a test) A gas mask, a smoke grenade, and a helicopter, thats all I ask."

"There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want."

"You know how Einstein got bad grades as a kid? Well, mine are even worse!"

"I think the surest sign that there is intelligent life out there in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us."

"Some people are pragmatists, taking things as they come and making the best of the choices available. Some people are idealists, standing for principle and refusing to compromise. And some people just act on any whim that enters their heads. I pragmatically turn my whims into principles."

"The purpose of writing is to inflate weak ideas, obscure pure reasoning, and inhibit clarity. With a little pratice, writing can be an intimidating and impenetrable fog!"

"Well, remember what you said, because in a day or two, I'll have a witty and blistering retort! You'll be devastated THEN!"

"From now on, I'll connect the dots my own way."

"Nothing spoils fun like finding out it builds character."

"Aww mom, you act like I'm not even wearing a bungie cord!"

"It's hard to conceal a water balloon."

"When birds burp, it must taste like bugs."

"Reality continues to ruin my life."

"Susie if you want to see your doll again, leave $100 in this envelope by the tree out front. Do not call the police you CANNOT trace us, you CANNOT find us. Sincerely, Calvin"

"I wanted to be a neo-deconstructivist but Mom wouldn't let me."

"That's the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn't good enough for me! I demand euphoria!"

"I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.

"Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless."

"A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day."

"It's psychosomatic. You need a lobotomy. I'll get a saw."

"I understand my tests are popular reading in the teachers' lounge."

"Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words."

"Where do we keep all our chainsaws, Mom?"

"To make a bad day worse, spend it wishing for the impossible."

"So the secret to good self-esteem is to lower your expectations to the point where they're already met?"

"It's only work if somebody makes you do it."

"In my opinion, we don't devote nearly enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks."

"You know, Hobbes, some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help."

"Its no use! Everybody gets good enemies except me."

"What's the point of wearing your favorite rocketship underpants if nobody ever asks to see 'em?"

"As a math atheist, I should be excused from this."

"This one's tricky. You have to use imaginary numbers, like eleventeen ..."

"I'm learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life ... Procrastinating and rationalizing."

"I have a hammer! I can put things together! I can knock things apart! I can alter my environment at will and make an incredible din all the while! Ah, it's great to be male!"

"I'm not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information."

"I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know."

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

Therapy Dog Visit

In June of 2010 I contacted Susquehanna Service Dogs (SSD) in Harrisburg, PA about possibly applying for an assistive dog for our daughter Miss B. We filled out the paperwork for an application and had a visit at their office several months back and found out we could be eligible for a dog. So today we met with a volunteer who owns a therapy dog for about an hour and a half at a local mall to see how Miss B would do, and here are some pictures of the time we spent.

Here Miss B is meeting Ember, a 6 year old female black lab, for the first time. Her owner, Diane, and Diane's 19 year old daughter Jamie came to help us see what life would be like with a service dog. She answered questions and shared experiences she has had with other people requesting dogs.

Diane had a bag of treats for Miss B to wear to help her praise Ember. Ember is a therapy dog which Diane brings in to schools to do demonstrations, and she uses Ember to give opportunities for people like Miss B to try out and see how they like working with an assistance dog.

Miss B loves animals and can't help but kiss them. We knew she'd adjust to Ember in short order.

Diane talked about Ember and how to take care of her. Ember is spayed now, but several years back she did have a litter of puppies for SSD to use as service dogs. They were all named after things in space since her husband was a star gazer. Currently there are two litters of puppies recently born to the program. The first group is named after Civil War people: George Meade, Joshua Chamberlain, Clara Barton, Julia Ward Howe and Harriet Beecher  Stow. The second litter is named after games: Yahtzee, Atari and Rummy. They can be seen on the site's puppy cam. 

She gave Miss B a brush to slick her coat.

More kisses.

More explanations. Puppies begin their positive reinforcement training as early as 7 weeks of age. Diane explained they are given "click" sounds and treats every time they do something the trainer wants them to do. If the puppy is working on "sit" the trainer will not say anything, but just stand still. The dog wants to please, so it will begin doing all sorts of things to earn a reward. If the dog sits, a click will sound and a treat will be given. This is done over and over until the puppy/dog does it. Then the word command "sit" will be added. It seemed to work very well for Ember.

Here is an exercise where Diane put two treats on Ember's paws and told her to "leave it." After a short while she picked up the treats and rewarded Ember with them for good behavior. Perhaps the dog can model some good behavior for Miss B.

Getting ready to talk a walk through the mall. Diane had a list of things she wanted Miss B to run through during the course of our session.

The dog is constantly rewarded for good behavior with a "clicker" the human hold in their hand, a small device that emits a clicking sound when you press it, and a treat (small bits of kibble which are part of the dog's daily diet). Miss B will learn how to train her dog to do new tasks if needed to help her out in day to day living.

Here they stopped because there was a small problem with the leash getting caught under Ember's front leg, as we who walk dogs always encounter. She gave the command "fix" to Ember and the dog just lifted her leg out of the tangle.

People were very curious to see a service dog in the mall and many stopped by to ask questions or just watch. Service Dogs are allowed to travel everywhere with their partner: malls, restaurants, churches, schools, airplanes.

Here Diane was showing two other commands like "up" and "off." Ember did wonderfully.

Diane's daughter, Jamie, also helped Miss B with a few things. They put duct tape on their thighs and gave Ember the command to "touch." She did it every time. Since dogs are color blind, the trainers use duct tape to show the dogs what to touch. Diane even had an expensive piece of equipment (an 18" dowel rod with duct tape attached to the end like a flag) to use to show Ember exactly what she wanted her to touch. It was amazing to watch.

The dog was commanded to "lap," and Ember rested on Jamie's legs with her front forearms providing a feeling of pressure. Ember also knows "visit" where she goes up to a person and rests her head in their lap.

A return of kisses to Miss B for all those goodies.

Ember up close. She was rarely distracted from her "work."

I think Ember needs another treat. Miss B had to wipe her hand each time the dog licked the treat from her palm.

Here Miss B was tasked with giving Ember 10 clicks and treats before they reached the next bench. There was a lot for her to remember to do: the clicker, the treats, holding the leash, counting to 10, watching where you walked. It was a lot to take in.

Another task Ember could do was press a button. Diane is explaining to Miss B how this would work. Ember. She can also turn lights off, which will be a great benefit to our electricity bill.

Resting at the end.

One more hug and kiss.

Miss B and Jamie with Ember. A nice Oreo cookie sandwich of girl-dog-girl.

Our next step will be to have a home visit in conjunction with another public outing with another therapy dog. If all goes well, Miss B will have the opportunity to visit with a few dogs in the late stages of training. These dogs are about 1 1/2-2 years old. If one of these dogs is a suitable match for Miss B, it will be further trained to address the specific needs of our daughter. Then there will be a 2 1/2 week daily class where the dog and human partner will be paired up and learn all kinds of skills for working together. It's a long, drawn out process, but we're wading through it with anticipation and excitement.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

#1 Free-Motion

Well, I tried my hand at my first ever free-motion quilting. There is definitely room for improvement, but I'm rather please with my "stab." I quilted around the bodies of each crab, did a meandering over the blocks closest to the crabs (looks a little like coral), spiraled a wave in the light blue border, and tried my first feathers in the big blue border. I used a variegated blue thread for the top and the bottom, and I think the back turned out equally as interesting. I'm not the neatest person, but they always say, "Practice, practice, practice."

My backing uses a little bit of some of the fabrics from the front.

I tried a machine binding this time and really like how it turned out. I only had to go over two small areas where I missed catching the fabric on the back side. I sewed the binding on the front side of the quilt and then I pinned the binding to the back just covering my stitching. I pinned every two inches or so. From the front side I stitched-in-the-ditch for the result below.

Here is the back of the binded quilt before adding a sleeve and label.

Below are the sleeves I added to hang the quilt. I divided a sleeve in two so a nail could be used in the center or the two sides.

Here is my label I created on my printer using a June Tailor Iron-On Quilt Fabric Sheet. I blocked out the recipient's name for the photo.

And here is the quilt hanging on some storage shelves in my basement. Not a pretty background, but you get the idea.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

Quilt top is complete!

All 80"x96" of this baby is put together. I've never made a quilt this large before. My "helpers" even had to stand on chairs to hold this one up. I love the way it turned out.

I hurried and threw it on my bed just to see what it would look like. I'm guessing this will keep us warm for many nights.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

Turning Twenty....Again

From my original stash of 20 fabrics for $37.00

I cut out my pieces for 30 blocks and stacked them in piles. That took some time and planning to utilize my fabric in the best possible way. I have plenty left over for other projects. Woo-hoo!

I laid all my pieces into sets of blocks that had no repeating fabrics. It took my best concentration to keep them all organized and in order. (For some reason I couldn't get this photo rotated, sorry).

Here is one block laid out before sewing. I started with the four squares in the upper left corner first and added the rectangle below to make section A. Then I sewed the three blocks in the upper right corner for section B and the three blocks in the bottom to form section C. I sewed A to B and added C at the bottom. 

I ended up with a 16 1/2"x16 1/2" block that looked like this. You can see I didn't actually sew section B the way I had first laid it out. I should have sewed it to the opposite side of the black fabric (oops!) I also turned it clockwise a few times.

Here is another block I did where I flipped the A section upside-down. In some blocks I turned the C section upside-down as well.

Here are 15 of my 30 blocks laid out on the air hockey table. It's coming along rather nicely.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

The "Eyes" Have It

OK, NOW they look like adorable little crabs! I think they're so cute. They look at you from all directions, just like Mona Lisa's eyes. Just try this: move your body to the left or the right, and you will always see a crab staring you down.

With the border completed, the top is finally finished. Now I'm off to the store to purchase some batting. I'll also be planning a creative backing for this quilt. I've been inspired by other quilt photos I've seen on-line. I'm also going to be doing free-motion quilting for the first time. Wish me luck!

Here is the small wall hanging I'm making for a gift. I ran out of button eyes, so I'll be picking them up from the store as well. Busy, busy, busy.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King

My Crab Quilt Top is coming along.

I finally finished attaching the blocks of my crab quilt. The next step is to add the borders or the eyes. It all depends on if I want to watch TV tonight or not. I can sew eyes in front of the tube. Below is a picture of my first practice run of the blocks. I turned that into a small wall hanging. Check out my tutorials on the right to see the steps I went through to get this far.

Carolyn "Care Bear" King